Origin of Species

So today I'm truly living up to the name "Jaded Lens." Here's a story about where that name originated:

Back in the summer of 1999, I was working for a Congressman on Capitol Hill. I gave tours, wrote correspondence, worked issues, etc., etc. I was known as the best tour guide on our floor in the Longworth Office Building. I knew how to work the staff at the Senate Cloak Room, the best times to sneak onto the floor during recess, all the quick shortcuts, the secrets of the Old House Chamber, George Washington's crypt, and even the history behind most of the state statues. All of this history overloaded my brain. The Capitol, the White House, indeed even the US Mint, ceased to sparkle. Finally, I was leading a tour for two Southside Virginia families when the Backstreet Boys turned out for a photo op in the Capitol Rotunda. The young tweener girls in my group immediately lost their heads, screaming and yelling and running all amok, supported by their parents, who then forced me to use my knowledge of Capitol shortcuts and hiding places for evil. They got their picture, but I lost something in the process. After that, I figured, "What's the point?"

I quickly became labeled as "jaded" by our office manager. "He's jaded, he used to be our best but now he ceases to wonder at the grandeur that is DC." So anyways, one day I'm lounging at my desk reading Roll Call when the left lens of my glasses popped out for no reason. Without even pausing to contemplate what had happened, I squinted my left eye and continued reading the article. The office manager saw this whole episode and said, "Wow, that must be your jaded lens." I kind of liked the ring of it.